Making Kimchi At Home

Homemade kimchi bubbling away in my pantry.

I eat a lot of kimchi. I’ve always loved it, but I’m currently obsessed with it. At least part of that is probably because my boyfriend is, so it was being brought to me with breakfast in bed and, let’s face it, anything is delicious when a hot guy you happen to be in love with is bringing it to you in bed. It is, however, also partly due to the brand of kimchi that he introduced me to, which is NOT traditional Korean kimchi.

He introduced me to Firefly brand kimchi, which is made here in Seattle. If you like traditional Korean kimchi, this may not work for you. But if you like something a little less fishy / powerfully rotten, and a little more spicy, tangy, crispy, this is THE SHIT! I could eat the whole jar.

The TEDx Talk on Sexual Shame – VIDEO

Woohoo, the video of the TEDx talk is ready to go. (Boohoo, I hate watching myself on video.) Public speaking is a strange thrill for me. It terrifies me, and I will generally say that I hate it. But I actually have a ton of fun doing it, and I can tell it “works,” even though it scares the living daylights out of me. That said, I am extremely proud of this one.

Top 10 Reasons Not To Trick And Manipulate Your Woman Into Losing Weight For You

I promised my friend Monica that I would shred The Top 10 Subtle Ways To Tell Her She’s Getting Fat from AskMen.com, because she was, in her words, too pissed off to do it herself. Turns out, I may have the same problem. And I’m sad, confused, worried. Mostly, the only words I’ve been able to come up with all day are, “What the fuck are you thinking, you fucking idiots?”

The article starts by stating:

Just Desserts & Sticky Toffee Pudding

Sticky Toffee Pudding inspired by Schlafly's Tap Room in Saint Louis.

What seems like a lifetime ago, my boyfriend  – who became my husband and eventually my ex-husband – and I would go to The Tap Room in Saint Louis just to eat the Sticky Toffee Pudding. We introduced his family to it, and for the years that followed, a majority of our family celebrations took place over a steaming slice of Sticky Toffee pudding. His mother, with whom my relationship has always been strained, would often forgo “real” dinner and just order the Sticky Toffee Pudding.

Chewy Ginger Molasses Cookies

Following the old wive’s tale of “feed anything that makes you feel icky” and herbal wisdom that ginger is a powerful antibiotic, the only logical course of action for a crafty maven with a killer cold is to bake ginger cookies. Thing is, I suck at baking cookies. And I’m super picky. I do not like cakey cookies, or puffy cookies. I like chewy cookies, but they have to have crunchy edges. And in my sickened state, I have no tolerance for anything that isn’t exactly as I want it, without have to be told, thank you very much.

Why I Hate “Medical Marijuana”

Medical marijuana, in a country hooked on booze, high-fructose corn syrup and cigarettes, makes about as much sense to me as Civil Unions for gay people but marriage for everyone else. As much as sense as Don’t Ask Don’t Tell for people who smoke weed but need to be protected from bigotry and are afraid of the repercussions of people finding out.

Sex Today: Ask & Tell (The TEDx Talk)

Every time I speak, I start with a solid idea of what I intend to say. Then it comes time to speak, and the energy of the crowd, the rhythm of the day, takes over. Invariably I say things that I didn’t quite mean to, and don’t say things that I did mean to.

And that’s when I return to my preferred method of speaking, which is actually typing, in the privacy of my own home, where I don’t get nervous. (I get so nervous, no matter how much or how little I prepare.)

With that said, here’s what I MEANT to say in my TEDx talk. It is shockingly close to what I actually said, just with a few more details and statistics, and better sentence structure. Complete with the photos that were on my slides, (and my slides were nothing but photos. I hate it when people put their entire talk on slides!)

We Could All Die Any Day

This is NOT my neck, it's just a neck.

Every now and then I have to go see my spinal surgeon. I don’t mind it because he’s awesome, and I always learn a lot. That, and I have a particularly strong ability to only hear what I want to hear and disregard the rest. He tells me all sorts of things about how completely fucked up my neck is, how miraculous I am, how nobody can do anything to fix it or help me not be in constant (goddamned mother fucking excruciating) pain all the time. He always looks sad as he tells me these things, but I’m used to hearing them, and mostly want to help him not feel so bad telling me that it’s all futile. And then I ask if I’m going to die, he says, “probably not,” and I hear, “you’re fine and amazing and will live to be 200.”

Bread & Butter Pickled Jalapeno Peppers

Bread & Butter Jalapenos with smoked salmon and cream cheese.

It’s pickling time! (Oh, who am I kidding, it’s always pickling time, if you’re me.) Today’s cunning culinary adventure in canning was brought to me by a post that My friend Susan posted about “Candied Jalapenos.” The very thought of them distracted me for the week that it took me to get around to making them – tangy, spicy, sweet! They’d be good on everything except maybe cake.

Angry Little Asian Man

Me and Andie. I don't usually dress like this, she does.

This was just one of those days that picks at you like you are the scab and it is the bored child who secretly likes pain and blood, but doesn’t want anyone to know about it, thus the little tiny swipes. I was late picking up my mom and her husband at the airport, I forgot to bring my water bottle to the gym, my windshield wiper flew right off my car (in the rain,) and my friend Andie texted me to say, “meeting soon?” Which is her very sweet way of saying, “bitch, you forget about me?” I would have deserved that, because I had forgotten, but Andie is too sweet to even think that, much less say it. I aspire to have her sweetness and grace. I don’t. But I was glad that she still wanted to meet, for lunch, way after we were supposed to be having coffee.