With any luck – and a whole lot of blood, sweat, tears and tequila – in 2 days, the US will dodge the terror of Fruity Pebble Fascism and elect our FIRST Female President. I’ll be nervous until it happens, terrified actually, but in the depths of that terror, I’m contemplating how it has brought out some of the more hidden detritus of toxic masculinity in our country.
No, not the fact that we call Hillary’s suits “pantsuits” instead of just suits. I mean, men wear the same fucking thing, but on lady-legs we have to give it a different name? (If Trump loses, do pants become “split-leg skirts?”) (By the way, when men wear their hair in a bun, it’s just a bun, not a “man bun.” Samesies.) Read more…
We have 22 athletes competing in the Festivus Games this weekend. For many of them it’s their first competition, and the idea of packing for it is as daunting as the idea of just doing the damned thing. (Personally, I find packing harder, there’s no one there to cheer you on, and if you are the goob who forgot your shoes, there’s not a whole lot of “way to give it your best effort” that’s gonna make up for it.) So, here’s my general approach: pack like you’re going camping. Which means, make sure you have everything you need, and nothing you don’t.
I generally break it into two big bags. My gym bag, and my food bag. You basically want to assume you’re going to the moon because it will be unorganized, running late and you will not likely be able to swing by some cute little café to get food.
Having spent the last too-many years living at competitions of various sorts, I have this down to a science. Here’s how I do it: Read more…
It’s that time of year again. That time, which comes 3 times a year for us at Rocket CrossFit, when dozens of us will band together for a Nutritional Challenge. We used to always do a Whole 30 Challenge, but for the last year, we’ve had several members – Brady and I included – do a Low-Carb, High-Fat plan instead, which is commonly called “keto.” In fact, since doing my first keto challenge 9 months ago, I’ve not gone back. I take vacations off, but other than that, I’ve felt so good, and found it so easy, that I’ve not stopped.
But, what is the difference between Whole 30 (and “paleo”) and a ketogenic diet? Read more…
The first Friday of every month means Hero WODs and champagne at Rocket. Those aren’t the only Hero WODs we do, but it’s definitely a special day for us. And after 5 years or so of programming, we got a little bored, and maybe a little jaded, about them. So we switched it up, and, as always, we got a response.
Backing up, there is a long tradition in CrossFit of writing Hero WODs to honor those killed in the line of duty. It’s a tradition that we also honor, and I have posted more profiles of fallen soldiers than I care to think about. Because I hate the fact that we keep sending our young across the planet to die in wars that are so often unjust and so often motivated by greed. (And then sent home, and too often neglected until they decay on our streets…..) That said, honoring the individuals that sacrifice their lives for our country is not something that is hard for me. I try to honor them every chance I get. I have always liked the Hero WODs, and I still do. Read more…
I’m sure I’ll be back soon with a long and scathing commentary about the awfulness of The CrossFit Games getting a sponsorship from Glock, and offering GUNS as prizes to the winners of the Games….
I mean…. WHAT THE FUCK. They combat the public health risk of Coca-Cola, and then give out guns as prizes. Nevermind that there is no connection between fitness and guns. Or that we are, as a country, mourning countless innocent people killed at the hands of yahoos with guns…..
And now, as affiliate owners, we are having this brand association connected to us. As if Dave Castro’s moron programming and endless homophobic, sexist douchebaggery weren’t enough for us to explain. “We’re not like that,” many of us have been assuring people for years. And now this.
I have already had a member ask me how my affiliate fee goes to promote gun violence in this country. WHAT THE FUCK? Read more…
The minute you tell me to relax, center my energy, find peace in some fucking place in my body that is currently itching and maybe even has a rash, I will want to cut you, and that is not relaxing. (Seriously, don’t tell me how to feel, okay?) I am happy to try and contort myself into any position you want, because playing with bodies is pretty much my favorite thing in the world, and it feels good, which is probably why I tried yoga yet again, but why are you telling me how I should feel about it?
I feel about most yoga classes the same way I feel about Fitspo propaganda: it’s guilt inducing bullshit designed to trap you in a slow slink to idealized conformity that is soul-crushing and body-harming and fuck you very much.
There seems to be this myth in the yoga world that “centered” looks like one thing, and is the goal. Or that “peace” is a thing you can achieve while licking your navel, or that “stillness” is where all the magic is, or… And while I honestly believe that for some people, that’s the way it works, to approach a class of people and assume that same goal for everyone is no better than me approaching a class of CrossFitters and saying “if you work hard enough, you too can have a bikini body some day.”
My daughter, who is a certified coach twice over, is learning to coach. (No, being certified is not the same thing as knowing what you’re doing.) She was shadowing me the other night, and pointed out an athlete who could be “doing so much more.” She asked, as a good student would, how she should approach it.
“Don’t,” I told her. “It doesn’t matter.”
I am not someone who believes in pushing people to do things they don’t want to do. Even our beloved members at Rocket.
I mean, I’ll push them a little. I’ll nudge them to show up. I’ll tell them to keep going when they look like they want to stop. But why would I care if one of them is only back-squatting 80 pounds when I know they could totally be doing 120?
I don’t care. Because they don’t care.
I have a gym full of people who could be doing more. They could try harder, they could get more weight or more reps or more whatever. Read more…
My husband and I own a CrossFit gym. We squeeze more than 200 members into a 1,500 s/f gym, 14 at a time. Rocket CrossFit is not a fancy gym, though we’re well-equipped. We don’t send members to The CrossFit Games, nor do we care to. We keep our prices as low as we possibly can, because our goal is to increase community, not just make money (though this is our livelihood.) As a result, we know many of our neighbors, run into them everywhere, and they know each other. Many friendships have been formed over the years. We are a classic small, neighborhood business, with a classic impact on community.
When we opened, our mission statement never included the words “money” and “profit.” We wanted to empower people and create community. We looked at the financial models, and knew that would come, but we didn’t put that first. IF, we believed, we could build a thriving community, the numbers would serve us and our business would thrive. We were right. Read more…